Firing

This is not a how-to-fire-people guide. 

This is a “how-to-get-over-yourself-so-you-can-fire-people” guide.

This is the guide I wish had the first time I ever “let go” of someone: I hesitated too long and never got clarity on what the real issues were. As a result, I completely botched the conversation and made her cry.  I’d like to help you do better.

The prospect of firing a teammate has struck fear and indecision into some of the toughest leaders I know. (And if you were wondering, where that word even comes from—to “fire” someone actually comes from the metaphor of “firing a gun” or expelling someone from a job, as opposed to pain-inducing pyrotechnics.)

I have coached several startup leaders through some difficult firing decisions. But in truth, what made them “tough” was not the decision itself, but how much pain and anguish the leader subjected him or herself to along the way. Feeling pain is mostly a good sign. It means you have compassion and care about your teammate---but it’s bad when it holds you back from making a decision as quickly as you need to. And for founders, moving too slowly on a firing decision is disproportionately costly. Your team is already small. The stakes are already very high. Your time and resources are already very limited. So, you have more to lose and (usually) almost nothing to gain by keeping a teammate around who is not performing. 

Whether you are embroiled in the throes of a firing decision right now, or you are breathing easy because you’re not there yet  ---  here are the three most common traps you may fall into when you first start to suspect that a certain teammate is not working out. 

#1: I can’t fire them because I haven’t been a good manager to them. 

This is the most common trap and the one that is the most tricky to get out of because it’s more about you than it is about them. Many startup leaders care deeply about their teammates and try valiantly to blame themselves as managers for a teammate’s sub-par performance. It sounds like this: “It just wouldn’t be fair. I haven’t given them enough time, attention, guidance, feedback.” That very well might be true and it’s hard to give up on someone who could have been great. I admire and respect your humble willingness to own the managerial mistakes you’ve made. But here’s the thing: chances are, you can’t turn this person around. If you are struggling with a firing decision, the first step is to ask: What will firing them say about me? And then pay attention to how you answer that question and how your answer makes you feel. You might uncover the source of your resistance and your anxiety. Consider whether, on some deeper level, you are keeping them around to give yourself a second shot or assuage your own guilt. Now, ask yourself:  If I envision what they would need in terms of training/support/coaching/management to improve---do we have the skills, resources and time to provide that? In the (few) cases where the answer is yes—it’s time for you to step up as a manager and get it done. In most cases, however, this won’t be true because you are leading an early-stage startup. To be clear: I am not saying you can fire freely without letting yourself off the hook. You better be reflecting deeply and learning quickly on how you fell short as a manager. Make a list: “Never again as a manager will I….” and stick to that list in the future. That’s what will set you apart as a founder who is actually learning, who is actually open to change, who will actually be able to grow and stay valuable to your company as it grows. 

#2: I can’t fire them because they’re not that bad.

This one is also tough. It usually sounds like this: “Am I being too hard? I mean, I don’t know what successful marketing/good engineering/[insert function you don’t have firsthand knowledge of] looks like.” First step: Ask yourself: How can I test my assumptions and evaluation of their performance?  Then, consult with a mentor, advisor or friend who will be able to give you that functional perspective and tell you whether your assumptions and expectations are realistic. Second step: review the goals you and your teammate set months ago and identify where there are performance gaps. Third step: When you realize you never set those goals in the first place, feel really really guilty for about 15 minutes. Then, go set and clarify those goals with every other member of your team who you want to keep around and manage well. Now, go back to step one and figure out if your implicit expectations for the teammate in question were even possible in the first place. Ask yourself, “With the right focus/goal clarity, how long would it take for this teammate to start exceeding expectations?”  If you have the time, go do it. 

There is another, more insidious, version of the “they’re not that bad” trap. It sounds like this: “Yeah, it’s true they haven’t been cutting it lately, but maybe it will turn around? Plus, I don’t even know how I would fire them. They have a family, a mortgage and a cute dog who is practically our office mascot.” From the outside, this seems silly or even a bit ridiculous, but from the inside this sh*t is real. Do not discount or suppress the emotions at stake---they are very real for you and will be just as real for the teammate who is fired and those who are left behind. It might feel awful or painful, but the far worse outcome is to go cold and try to convince yourself to not “get emotional” about it. I do encourage you to expand the range of emotions you let in—and consider the other dogs, mortgages and families, your own and those of your other teammates. Once you’ve let yourself feel all the awfulness this situation has wrought, sit down to evaluate your alternatives. You could let him languish until he decides to fire himself, resigning in a dark cloud of bitterness. Or you could keep her around for six more months collecting more options while you pull your hair out in frustration as other teammates work overtime to compensate. 

Make sure you are asking yourself:  Am I letting my feelings of guilt (see trap #1) or my fear of how much it will take to replace them (see trap #3) interfere with my honest evaluation of their performance?

#3:  I can’t fire them because I don’t have time. 

This excuse is the only one I occasionally accept as a compelling explanation for postponing a firing decision. It usually sounds like: “No way! I just don’t have time to deal with that transition. How would I ever find someone really good fast enough?” 

When you’re saying this, it’s time for an eyeballs-in-the-mirror stare-down with yourself. Yes, there will be some short-term chaos. Yes, you will have to sacrifice time and attention to other really valuable things like your new product development strategy or making progress on your “must-do” list. In general, though, there is nothing more important than your people and their ability to perform. You already know that everything you do as a leader either directly or indirectly serves your teammates’ abilities to do their best work. You carefully recruit and hire them, you manage them, you raise money to pay them, you deal with all the admin crap so they can focus on the product, and you foster the culture that bonds this unlikely group of startup warriors together. So, I would push you to be very, very picky about when you choose to say you don’t have time to fire them. 

So, ask yourself: What am I prioritizing over firing and replacing them? It could very well be that the company does have some critical short-term milestones that do take precedence over a departure (e.g., closing a current round; launching a product; staying full-staffed through the holiday shopping season) But then, to ensure you are not hiding completely behind the “not now” argument, ask yourself: What is at stake if I don’t fire and replace them within a certain time-frame?  Here is where you get to do risk assessment: How much more will she poison the culture or wreak havoc in her waning months? How much more irreplaceable knowledge will he take with him if I fire him in a few more months? 

Knowing that these three big traps are out there is half the battle to getting out of them—or not falling into them in the first place. And that—to return to the inspiring metaphor behind this f-word—is how you will finally be able to pull the trigger.